Well, where to start???It's always so long before I post again and so much has always happened in between, that its hard to get a post started....
Summer always brings about some challenging behavior with JC. Seems like the structured, scheduled school days give him a feeling of stability and he feels safe in those boundaries and when summer days are here, and there's not as much structure (which for the rest of us sounds wonderful!!!) he doesn't know how to act.
This summer, I met with his psychiatrist right before school let out for summer. She highly recommended that I have a schedule this summer to help us "not step on eggshells" all summer long. Devon and I had been talking for months about getting some kind of chore chart ready for the kids for summer but hadn't gotten around to it yet. Then, I talked to a friend of mine who is a work at home mom (like me) and she incorporated a schedule into her chore chart. It really got me thinking. I decided to somewhat copy her idea and turn it into our own style. I still haven't gotten around to making the actual board for my idea, but we HAVE started using the scheduled chore chart :) It has made for some happier days - yes, we still have some crazy and outlandish behaviors on some days, but I can tell it definitely has helped, even with the other two's behavior. We also have started trying to incorporate "yes, mam" and "yes, sir" into their daily communication to try and get some respect increased for each other.
Here's how ours works... I made 2x2 squares with chores on them, including the normal things they would usually do on a daily basis. I also made a schedule for them. For us, it is be ready with teeth and hair brushed and breakfast eaten by 9:30. 9:30-10:15 is clean rooms, make beds and read for at least 1/2 hour. 10:15-11:30 is chore time (they can do something non-electronics related if they finish early), then lunch and free time (no electronics or "games" until after 11:30 is allowed) starts at noon :) They then receive $/day for the chores they do. If they do not finish one or they refuse, they will not get paid for the ones they did do either, so they know they better finish all of them on their chart. Then, I keep a running total of how much money they have earned. I deduct for all of our summer activities, including them paying for my way to do the things they want to do. I am also having them save some for spending money when we take our trip to California in July. Whew, what a nice thing to know that they will be able to spend their own money and know that they themselves hard earned it. This is all posted in our hallway between the kids bedrooms upstairs. They wake up in the morning and head to the schedule to see what chores I've posted for them for that day. I do try to rotate the more difficult, time consuming chores and if they are time consuming, the others may have more chores than the one with the time consuming chores.
Here are some of our chores (reminder: our kids are 11, 13 and a Bipolar/ADHD/FAE 14 year old):
Do your own laundry including sheets and towels
Water flowers in front and back yards
Vacuum
Wash car
Clean out and vacuum inside of car
Take out trash around house
Wash dishes
Put dishes away
Dog Poo
Cat litter box
Plan and Help make dinner
Clean their bathroom
Mow the lawn and a few others...
When they are done, right now, they are just crossing it off on the list and then I check to make sure its done to "moms standards". However, when our board is finished, the chores will be hanging under their names under "to do" and they will move them to "done" with they are finished. *Also, weekends are "off" but we still have them do necessary chores when needed which they usually just do now without complaining or anything - YES!!!
Anyways, Just thought some of you struggling to get through summer might enjoy a different kind of idea that might work with your kiddos. Oh, I forgot... we always choose a couple of FREE ideas of things to do during the week and a Paying for idea so they can use their earnings.... always after 11:30 of course - as much as possible anyways :)
