Roller Coaster Ride called Life
John 16:33New Living Translation (NLT)
33 I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”
I am taking heart!! Thankful that He who is in me has overcome!! PTL... Our life since March of 2013 has been a roller coaster ride. There have been ups and downs and loopty loops....
JC is now in a good place! We are missing him so much but are thankful that God's plan is bigger than ours. I would've never thought that JC wouldn't be at home with us, I just couldn't even imagine it without thoughts of fear and worry. The choice to bring him to California in March 2013 definitely wasn't a "good" one by looking at, but I know for sure that it was in God's plans for all of us. This journey to find clarification on diagnosis for JC's many different presentations has been long (since he was 3) but we are now finally getting the help and services he really needs. His placement at this new facility only 30 minutes from home has been truly a blessing in disguise. Yes, it is really difficult sometimes to drive twice a week and spend hours in a small, hot room playing cards and visiting with my son... but it is oh, so worth it. To see how he is beginning to grow, change and respond is amazing. To spend time with him is heart-breaking and bittersweet. I am hopeful that he will come home but will not be surprised if he doesn't either. I am open to what the Lord has in store for us as a family and for JC as an almost adult individual. His current "home" is filled with a caring staff and administration who have real relationships with the boys in the facility and a desire to help them. The administrator is actually creating another facility that will help boys just like JC!! If it gets done in time, JC will be transferred there and they love him and want him to be able to go there. It is in the same town, but it will serve boys with BOTH mental health issues AND developmental issues. It will be longer term for most of the boys, but have options to finish programs and/or home visits, etc. They will have goats that they will take care of on the property and land for growing things, etc. It sounds like it will be a great place and it is very very needed in the southern part of our state!
He now has too many diagnosis' to list all, but most of them are:
PTSD, Probable Fetal Alcohol Syndrome with Bipolar features, Bipolar 1 Disorder severe without psychotic features, Expressive Language Disorder, Borderline Intellectual Functioning (functions as a 8-9 year old as of present time), ADHD, Pervasive Development Disorder. The newest thing they are testing him for is Sensory Integration Issues, which I have known he has some for years! What I didn't know is that he could get Occupational Therapy for that??? Crazy how things work and don't work or how some people know some things and other people don't... I hope that I can give good information to other parents/caregivers who are looking for answers now that I have been through so much.
JC has presented with a mixture of features that have caused doctors, psychologist and psychiatrists alike to be stumped over the years. I think it is because there is such a mixture of things going on that it has been hard to sort it all out. This poor little guy started out with so much against him but God (there it is again... BUT GOD!!!) He has been faithful to carry us through MANY storms and enabled us to find joy in small victories. My big 6'3" and still growing, son is going to be 17 at the end of this year and while there is still much against him... he has so much FOR him. My prayer is that he will see his own worth in Jesus' eyes and know that he is loved not just by his family, but by the Creator Himself. While he might think he has been abandoned many times in his young life, Jesus will NEVER leave him or forsake him. So many verses.... way more than the ones below speak about this!
Deuteronomy 31:8 ESV
It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; He will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.”
Deuteronomy 31:6 ESV
Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”
Joshua 1:9 ESV
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
1 Peter 5:7 ESV
Casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.
Amazing and Awesome how the Lord already knows our human fleshly hearts and spurred the writers from so long ago to include so many comforting, calming and reassuring verses to help us foolish human beings turn to Him in times of trouble and triumph. The Bible is alive and so purposeful and applicable to me!! In the midst of all JC's things, we still have 2 teenagers at home going through typical teenage things themselves... whew... this season of life sure is trying and my knees are going to be knobby <from praying> by the time the last one leaves home....
Back to JC... He is funny and giving, friendly and gregarious. He can also be hurtful, spiteful and way hyper to the point of annoying pretty much everyone he is around and not being able to control it past a certain point. We are trying to focus on the positives and teach around the negatives to show him who he can be :) JC is kind and caring to those less than himself... but if he feels threatened in any way by a person, he is quick to react negatively. This is part of what we are working on. This and also to share his feelings and parts of himself he covers up with humor and avoidance. His anxiety runs high if feels like he is being asked to reveal his true self... part of this is the PTSD and results of his awful beginning in this life. He so enjoys when Grammy and Pappy or Aunt and Uncle can come visit and asks about family and pets and friends often... sometimes the stimulation of visitors throws him off and he gets overly hyper and visitors have to leave :( My request is that you would pray for him and management of these hyper feelings resulting from anxiety and the stimulation/excitement of having them there. Please pray for his safety and well-being as well... Thank you supporting family and friends for being here for our family! We appreciate the support you give through prayer, visits to JC, listening, reading and trying to understand the haphazard blog (lol)...
