Autumn Ramblings....

Autumn 

Well, Fall is definitely here and school's been in for quite some time. We had a two day break a couple weeks ago and went camping. Beautiful weather and everyone had a great time, even JC. Fishing, bike riding, trail hiking and the occasional deer spotting was fantastic, but for JC (and the rest of the boys) it was the big sawed off tree stump filled with random, miscellaneous bullets that held their attention that weekend. 

All day long, at least one of the boys would be swinging the axe trying to dislodge a bullet from the stump. I nick-named our weekend Rel"axe"ing Retreat, ha ha! It was a little annoying, especially to our neighbors around us, but it sure did keep those boys busy. It was a nice break from the last couple months of school. For JC, I wasn't sure how he would handle no routine again... especially since Devon had been working a job at night and couldn't come... and if the first day of packing everything up was to be my only indicator, then we probably would've stayed home - it was that difficult. Think: Temper Tantrum from a kid way taller and stronger than me!  However, God made grandparents strong and steady for a reason... at least I think He made my parents to be like that and our biggest support when it comes to the kids. "Pappie" came over and picked him up and he helped Pappie pack stuff for him and Grammie while the rest of us packed our stuff. It worked... and while the rest of the trip wasn't perfect (when is it, ha ha??) it was fun and oh, so so so much better than staying home. JC even stayed an extra night with Paps and Gram giving me and E and A some much needed respite time. 

So, this fall has brought some other changes too... we decided to start JC in individual counseling. I think it will be a good thing for him and he is old enough now to understand it all. Also, school has become increasingly more difficult for him (IEP meeting AGAIN this week). Its the pressures of trying to fit in, he's found himself a "girlfriend" and its high school - that in and of itself explains some of it. The "girlfriend" aspect has been a hinderance all by itself. JC still has impulsive issues and that didn't just stop because he's older and in high school now. He still bugs and touches the girls and annoys the boys, but he is also becoming more aware of them and their reactions and responses. This is good and bad. We will see what the school says this week... his grades also have gone down recently so we'll be looking into that as well. 

I personally, cannot wait for the time change coming in a week and a half. It is so dark when I take the kids to school in the morning. I know I'll hate it when it ends up being dark by 5:00 but right now, I'm looking forward to the lighter mornings... 

Well... hope the changes of Autumn leave you with warm thoughts! We'll need those warm thoughts here as we go thru the next few cold months... bundle up, grab your hot cider or hot cocoa, sit by the fire and read a new book :) Those are the things that keep me sane ;o) God Bless You and remember if my blog may benefit someone you know, please share it... I was thinking of making it private, but just can't bring myself to do that just yet. I can't help thinking that God has me writing for a reason and it would be missed if my blog were private. So, I will just ask you all to please keep the information as private as you can... Thanks!

Goodbye Summer, Hello HIGH School...

Goodbye Summer, Hello HIGH School...

Well, School has officially started and we will be entering our second week on Tuesday after having Labor Day off. The first part of summer was fantastic and then we got distracted from our goals when we went on vacation to California...but all in all.....a success!

The ending of summer still flew by rather quickly with only one major upset in August. JC was having major anxiety (combined with puberty and hormones - ugh!). We ended up at the hospital who would not take him!!! It's so crazy! We ended up with emergency anti-anxiety meds until we could see his regular psychiatrist who then prescribed buspar. Not so sure it's working even yet... so please be praying for us all. It is so hard to figure out what he is feeling or experiencing or needing since all his emotions come out in almost the same way. When he's happy, he usually takes it too far and gets goofy and impulsive. When he's sad, he is usually down on himself, hitting himself and taking out his sadness by being mean to himself and family. When he's angry, its the scariest.... he has been getting more and more physically aggressive and disrespectful. He is threatening and using his height to push his siblings and parents around. We have to be "on top of it" all the time which being a teenager, he definitely does NOT like! We just didn't know what he needed until we started to realize that school was upon us and then we knew... he was getting anxious for the new school year at a new school with bigger expectations, etc.

Even with all these changes and me wanting to be the mother bear, I have had to loosen up the "momma strings" and let him go more than I normally have. Both times this summer, I let him head off on his own at the water parks (of course he usually finds his way back to us fairly quickly) I have to remember that he is almost 15 and even though he doesn't usually act like a 15 year old, the world is going to treat him that way and I'd better prepare him for it. He started high school with a bang! He is riding his bike to and from school on his own. That is a major milestone for me (he he... not him, he's been ready for this for a long time, it's me!!)  I'm going to have to let him go and make big kid mistakes. I can only prepare him and let him know the consequences for those things so I will know I did my best with him and so he will hopefully be able to make wiser choices. He's got such a big heart and really wants to do good and well most of the time, but as he gets older the mistakes get costlier and not just for mom and dad, but for him.  

There's so many issues JC has to deal with and so as a family, there are so many we have to deal with on a daily basis that its hard to remember the positives sometimes. There are times when we just want to give up, but remember that God called us to a higher purpose.... and He loves us and wants us to succeed in raising JC and our other two kids. 

So, back to school... I can't believe JC's a freshman! I remember my high school years like they were yesterday :) I know, don't we all say that! But I do... and I just so hope for the best for him. It's been a strange "honeymoon period" of the first week of school - we had our meeting with the school at the end of May and were told he was going to be monitored at the high school with someone in every class like he was in middle school, just with different aides, not only one. As of yet, the aides are making themselves un-noticeable or they just aren't there??? I haven't called the school yet, because to be honest, I have been on pins and needles expecting a call from them. It never came last week! He made it through block schedule of high school on his own! What an accomplishment even if it is only for the honeymoon period (oh, you moms of kids like JC understand what I mean with honeymoon period right???) Block schedule still scares me and I wonder who came up with such a ridiculous idea. Most kids cannot fully focus and work for 90 minutes straight - even the so called "normal" kids... Maybe juniors and probably seniors, but really... freshman and sophomores??? Well, I have great hopes for JC's high school years and will be praying for him minute by minute as we go through this school year. I know he'll probably never be a doctor, but I also know he's a fighter and will hopefully want to be on his own enough to work at something hard enough to learn to be who God wants him to be and that is enough for me... my hope is in the Lord, maker of Heaven and earth! 

Jeremiah 29:11 (This is meant for all of God's people, not just the "normals" lol)
"For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope."

So, I know this was a little all over the place, but I guess that's just how its got to be :) Have a great school year!!!